2024 - A year for more mutual empathy
Do people still care about living in a thriving local community?
As I’ve been working on FriendApp, I have become a strong proponent of leaning more into our neighborhoods. It is fun to know lots of people from all over, but there’s something special about relationships with people nearby who you can see and run into around town. I have made a concerted effort to get to know more people in my local community.
As I prepare for 2024, I’ve been thinking about the divisiveness I see in the world and about the impact of so much time in our own homes, on our devices, and less time spent in our neighborhoods.
Sometimes it’s easy to think that your views represent the more empathetic view, and that people on the other side lack empathy. I think the large majority of people are empathetic but just see things from a different perspective. I believe that as we engage more in our community, we can increase our empathy towards those who may have different beliefs or people who are personally facing challenges.
Here are just some examples of the most contentious topics that we seem to be facing:
Immigrants who are fleeing their countries (and minorities who may be impacted by the demonizing of immigrants) vs. those who have been living in a community and fear the change
Women / parents who choose not to have a baby / another baby vs. the life of the unborn
Jewish sovereignty vs. Palestinian freedom to have a country
Future generations right to a livable planet and those living in climate threatened areas today vs. general cost of living and the livelihood of those who work in traditional energy industries
LGBT recognition and acceptance in society vs. those who are threatened by change in hetero-dominant culture (conservative norms) and the concern of exposing their children to these topics “before they are ready”
The right to hold on to your own hard-earned money vs. recognizing that taxes are needed to run quality schools, improve crumbling infrastructure, and keep our streets safe
Those who can enjoy seeing their property value rise vs. others who were not so fortunate to be able to purchase a home and have difficulty with increasing rents
As we engage with people who see the world differently, it can be helpful to start conversation on less sensitive topics. We should aim to build more rapport with our neighbors, and not jump to debates or avoid one another.
If conversation does turn to a topic where there may be strong opposing viewpoints, try to be a better listener and ask questions. Sometimes in conversation I even repeat in my head a personal mantra, ‘Chuck be quiet’, lol. If the person is saying something I wholeheartedly disagree with, I try not to be overly negative with my body language and facial expressions. And then perhaps bring the conversation back to something we can agree on. I already made the mistake of getting riled up once a few years ago around COVID and a media conspiracy theory, and I promise myself to never let that happen again. It did not lead to a productive discussion, and I learned that if I want to learn and potentially have someone see something from a different angle, raising my voice is not the way to go.
Occasionally I ask myself, do people even care about living in a community anymore? To what degree do people place importance on their building or block, their town, their county, their state, their nation? The more secluded we are in our own tech bubbles, do we just continue to become more individualistic? Social media can sometimes become an echo chamber, with algorithms designed to keep us engaging with the same content, or responding to content that might trigger us. Taking stock in the importance of these different levels of community, how we engage, and acquire information, could propel us to think less just about ourselves, but also the role we can play in finding acceptable solutions to improve the world we wish to live in. More simply, just engaging with locals outside of our usual circle can give us a better frame of reference as to why certain issues or viewpoints may be important.
I hope that more of us think about these things in 2024, and that we can begin narrowing some of the rifts that appear to have become irreparable chasms. Next time you think about making a “political” comment, ask yourself, is it completely polarizing? How could you rephrase yourself or adapt your tone so that your words will be better received?
Take into consideration how many people do you know personally who see things differently. Get out more in your neighborhood, find local activities and invite other people from the community to join you. Let’s see if we can reduce the divisiveness in 2024 and seek more understanding and compromise. Hopefully we can introduce something good that is contagious 🙂
Thx for reading and best wishes for the New Year.